jackson katz does an amazing job addressing the first lie of my series on “Lies Society Tells You about Rape and Sexual Violence”. his message is truly inspiring and hits so many happy sensors in my soul! there is no need to reinvent the wheel here, but here a few points i’d like to add to this topic.
for so long, we have looked at violence against women as something only women need to deal with, and that’s the issue. women shouldn’t just deal with sexual violence, as if it’s a normal part of a life experience. It’s anything but a normal part of life experience, because men don’t experience sexual violence nearly as much as women do. this makes it a specific experience that targets women.
for hundreds of years christians have used bible verses like ephesians 5:22-24 to bully, beat and oppress women into submission, convinced this is God’s will for his children. both men and women have written books targeted at women to “be silent and let your husband lead, it’s your duty to God!”.
but the true duty to God lies in the hands of men, and he makes this clear even in his message to women about submitting. he tells women to “submit to your own husbands as you do unto the Lord, for the husband is the head of the wife AS [emphasis added] Christ is the head of the church. . . ” for those who have read the new testament, what did Jesus do for the church? He died for her, gave Himself up for her, cared for her needs over His. He didn’t beat, and abuse her.
ephesians goes on to say in verse 25 to the husbands “husbands love your wives, JUST AS [emphasis added] Christ loved the church and GAVE HIMSELF UP FOR HER to make her holy, cleansing her by washing of water through the word and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle, or any other blemish, but holy and blameless…”
two points are important to take away with those two sections; 1. the Lord instructs women to submit to their OWN husbands, not men in general. and 2. the Lord instructs men to give up their lives for their wives, making sure to keep their wives free from blemish or blame and to always keep her holy and treat her as he would treat his own body.
men, in God’s eyes, are responsible to protect women from abuse and lead other men to do the same. so men, if you want to lead like God tells you to lead, then stand up against violence against women, THAT is your calling.
violence against women IS a man’s issue.